'Not Right Now' Really Means Not Anytime Ever

Dear Jeff and Lori,

I’ve been dating a guy on and off for almost a year. I’m ready for a committed relationship, but every time I bring up being exclusive, he tells me it’s just not the right time. I love him and he says he cares about me. I’m always the person he comes to and confides in when he’s having a hard time, so I don’t understand why he doesn’t want to take our relationship to the next level. He keeps saying his life is too busy right now and he’s always got something going on that makes it difficult for us to spend time together. How do I get him past his resistance to commitment?

Signed, Tired of Waiting

Catching A Unicorn: Is she out of my league?

Dear Lori and Jeff,

I recently met a woman who may be the "one." She is kind, beautiful and independent with a promising career. The only problem is I'm starting to think she's too good for me. I'm worried she'll eventually realize she can do better and want to move on. I find myself increasingly on edge, constantly trying to analyze what she's thinking and where I stand — things I've never really done before. How do I navigate this situation and not lose the woman of my dreams?

Signed, Maybe Not Enough

Hating Dating

Dear Lori and Jeff,

I was in a relationship for longer than I should have been — mostly because I was dreading the idea of dating. When I first became single again, there was definitely a part of me that was excited by the idea of having the opportunity to meet attractive, single women. But actually having to date has been really frustrating and disappointing. I hate the idea of having to sell myself, and dating apps and sites seem so superficial and fake. I'm also past the bar-hopping phase in my life and am not looking for drunken one-night stands. I want a relationship. I've worked hard to establish a good life with a job I love, and am ready to share my passions and adventures with someone special. Where do I start?

Signed, Hating Dating

She Said, He Said: A Relationship advice blog written by Married, Marriage Therapists

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